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The Best Knickers in the World?

I am in no way exaggerating when I tell you that these knickers by Hanky Panky are by far the best thongs that I have ever worn. I hate thongs. I even hate the word thong. But these lace beauties are just in a different league to the usual thrush-inducing arse-flossing scraps of nylon that are routinely offered to us by lingerie brands. “Here! Spend £38 on the matching thong why don’t you? You’ll possibly be infertile after three hours and have a strange rash in your special areas, but we don’t care! It’s MATCHING for Christ’s sake!” You know the scratchy ones that I’m talking about, don’t you? The ones that appear to have been pattern-cut by a madman. Or perhaps just a man.

The problem with thongs is that they are a bit of a necessity. Almost every outfit that’s figure-skimming requires a thong. At home, beneath the comfy tracksuit, M&S 100% cotton knickers rule the roost, but when it comes to stepping out into the world, something a little daintier is often needed. Yes, you can get away with those flimsy seamless pants (Debenhams do good ones, but they do tend to curl up in the leg and then dig in) and if you wanted to, you could wear Spanx, but it’s all a bit cumbersome and sweaty, isn’t it?

So for now, the Hanky Panky is my favourite pant. This knicker is one-size-fits-all, though, and I have a feeling that is why it is so supremely comfortable on my size 10 frame. Were I a size 18/20, I’m not so sure how comfy it would be, but I would welcome any feedback from various knicker-sizes – please leave a comment! As a little test, though, I have stretched a pair to their limits and they seem to have quite a bit of leeway. I could get two of me into mine without overly stretching them. (Now that would be a fun test, wouldn’t it?) There’s no singular piece of elastic sewn through, so you don’t get a cutting-in line as the knicker stretches, the whole piece of lace just stretches to accommodate.

I am not lying when I tell you that I have never been more pleased with my knickers – I bought four single pairs, and then I spotted them in the sale at Net-a-Porter and bought five more pairs! The best thing about these is that I’ll never grow out of them – they’ll last me my whole lifetime! (Visualises a 90-year-old self with Zimmer frame, wearing acid-green thong.)

£18 per pair, but you know what? I’ll pay that, I’ll pay that gladly – no muffin-top, no VPL, no vastly uncomfortable piece of fabric slicing my bottom in half. Just soft waistband, substantial gusset (I have ALWAYS wanted to say that) and brilliant, acid-bright colours.

Find them at  Net-a-Porter

61 comments

  1. haha! this is one of your funniest posts!

  2. I’d love to get them, but alas these will do me no favours at all. The lower stomach was never the same after I had my daughter.. I think it got stretched beyond capacity. I’ve diet and exercised to make it go but no.. its staying with me for the rest of my life. So love me, love my loose lower tum, only thing that would make it go is surgery. So my knickers always need to take this into consideration. xx

  3. I completely agree Ruth! I bought one of these in black for a posh do and was so impressed. Once on, you basically forget you’re wearing them. Invisible! Any knicker that doesn’t try and bury it’s way up to daylight is a winner by me! x

  4. There’s nothing I appreciate more than a substantial gusset!

    SOLD!

  5. Is the lace-cotton version just as good as the pure lace ones? Just wondering, as the lace-cotton version comes in nude. Bright acid colours might not look so good under a white dress eek!

  6. Oh my. Ignore my comment. Silly me. I just saw the trio combination which includes the nude version. Sorry!

  7. Hi Ruth, These sound like a girls dream…however 18GBP…i wish..logged on…and a set of three are 78EUR!!! WAYYYYYYYY out of my pricepacket..ah well one can only dream of comfort in a thong!!!

  8. will there still be visible panty lines if you wear a seamless panty under figure-skimming clothes? what is your advice?
    I read in a fiction book that thongs feels like a rubber band on your butt so I’m afraid of trying one on

  9. This was hilarious!

    Also I wanted to say that I saw your face in one of my wedding magazines! You had a huge floral headband on (quite Lana Del Ray-esque actually) and looked gorge!

  10. Oh Ruth, you do make me chuckle! Love reading your posts, they’re both informative and entertaining and your personality really shines through. Keep up the good work and enjoy those substantial gussets! :)

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