Sh*tfit of the Day: Crap Delivery Services

crap delivery van uk

crap delivery van uk

I’m getting seriously, seriously disgruntled with some of the parcel delivery services in the UK at the moment. I’m not talking about Parcelforce or Fedex (though they have their moments), I’m talking about these shoddy little local services that employ people in unmarked vans who post scraps of photocopied paper through the letterbox without ringing the doorbell to see if you’re in. The people that collect in my area for a certain huge clothing etailer can barely be bothered to leave their vehicle half the time – I once saw the little van stop, look at my house and then drive away. I had ordered a collection, and I knew it was them because they had picked up before! They didn’t come back, and they didn’t return for the subsequent three collections – the etailer informed me that the couriers had stopped coming to my address because I was never in. (Though on all three occasions I had been in all day accepting deliveries, including from – wait for it – that very same online clothing store.)

And then we come to the delivery service who won’t be named. I’d like to give you a clue and say “rhymes with”, but it doesn’t rhyme with anything. Ironically, it looks a bit like “model” but it definitely doesn’t rhyme with it… Anyway, they didn’t deliver on the right day with my huge Amazon order, and then on the day that they did try to deliver, they told Amazon that I had refused the delivery! Funny, when I was IN PARIS THAT DAY. Lies annoy me more than anything, especially when I have to sort out the mess that results from them. I tried to phone them, but couldn’t get through on their ridiculous phone system because I didn’t have the 8-digit code that the driver had failed to write on the slip. Frustrating? You bet! I can tell you, it’s a good job that they don’t have a face-to-face service centre because people would have riots in it. I feel truly sorry for their Twitter people – it’s not their fault. They seem to do quite well at keeping tempers relatively soothed, but boy – I hope they’re paying them handsomely.

What annoys me most, I think, is the fact that these big companies are employing these rubbish delivery services in the first place. Because, no doubt, they are dirt cheap. I can understand, to a certain extent, that you’d want to keep delivery charges down for your company if you’re offering free delivery on orders, that makes sense. But when a customer is paying a yearly fee for prime/premier delivery services? No. If I pay, then I expect the deliveries to be smooth and efficient. I’m all for supporting the smaller businesses but only if they can actually deliver the goods! I have a feeling that this cheapo delivery strategy is going to start backfiring – the girl at Amazon seemed completely unsurprised that there had been a problem with my “doesn’t-rhyme-with-model” delivery.

Your own stories below, please, I very much enjoy hearing them. Mattress through the letterbox? Lost sofa? Parcel left in the recycling bin? Get typing…

(Image from freedigitalphotos.net, artfully altered by Yours Truly, using the Mac equivalent of PC Paint.)

Ruth CrillySh*tfit of the Day: Crap Delivery Services

53 Comments on “Sh*tfit of the Day: Crap Delivery Services”

  1. Michael Barnes

    I’m sick to death of them…all the big companies seem to use them and it’s a disgrace…you get these halfwit otherwise unemployable morons that turn up when they feel like it…I have one that looks like a homeless guy who doesn’t even bother to come to my house…he just chucks my parcels in the garden even if it’s raining! I’ve complained numerous times but he seems to work for HDL, Yodel and some other firms so getting a complaint through is difficult…he lies constantly…when I’ve rung up the courier service he states that I wasn’t home or there was an access restriction to my property when I know full well he hasn’t even been there. He turns up days later with my parcel and I catch him dumping it…he says he didn’t think anyone was in…yet hadn’t actually gone to the house! I ask him why he’s 3 days late with my next day delivery…he says he never had it despite having reported me not being home 3 days earlier….well if he didn’t have it why was he allegedly at my home 3 days ago? He then changed his story and said that he didn’t have time to deliver it on that day…yet he’d logged me as not being home at mid day…seems like he had the rest of the day to me….He’s a lying git and can’t be bothered to deliver half the time…companies like amazon shouldn’t be using these so called couriers and half the time they aren’t…they send them through companies like yodel and HDL and it’s them who hire these useless self employed couriers. I have a deep seeded hatred for delivery people because of the shoddy service they continually provide…there are plenty of unemployed people who would do a better job…maybe some of these delivery people need replacing.

  2. KeepBusinessTidy

    Yes it does look a bit ropey when someone turns up in an unmarked car and no uniform when they’re working for a bigger company. Once I’d ordered a bigger item so it was standing on the ground next to the delivery person and after signing she just turned around and left. The item wasn’t heavy but I thought it was a bit rude to not hand it over. Oh and it had been put in a puddle.

  3. Sundal

    I’ve never had a problem with asos, the next day delivery always turns up on time. H&M are a nightmare though. It can take 2 weeks or sometimes even more to receive a parcel from them, and that’s after paying nearly 4 quid for it. Don’t they realise that with the rate they churn out fast fashions their customers have moved onto the next trend in that time?!

  4. Clever

    Aaaargggghhh! Decide to give Fruit in name company another chance and use their did bound code which generously worked on top of a offer they were running. And then had to go away at short notice, apparently they have left two cards, I get back, not even one card!!! No way to contact Courier that looksile model, so have emailed company. Soooo fristrating, told them to change courier company and that I won’t be ordering or shopping in store with them again. Disappointing…

  5. Hannah

    I once had House of Fraser leave a £100 order on the doorstep..in a cardboard box…in the rain. Despite the fact I told them to leave with next door who was expecting the package.

  6. Dayle Mclaren

    I hate Yodel! Absolutely terrible, i’m an amazon prime memeber and one time they had put on the online tracking that they had attempted delivery! They hadn’t as i was in and they didnt leave the wee slip either so they hadnt even bother coming to the door. I prefer the Royal Mail as there is a depot down the road from me so if i miss something its easy to go and get it. I know alot of people dont like Hermes but my Hermes guy is brilliant! He knows where to put the packages when im not in so when i see something is getting delivered by them i dont need to worry about my package or being in for it. I also hate CityLink as they are useless, i dont know if they are still in business as i havent had anything from them in a while but when they were around they were useless!

  7. Monica

    Ah, delivery companies. What gets me every time is their chronic inability to deliver on weekends. See, the problem is that I am required to be present in the office between the hours of 9 and 5 five days a week in exchange for a monthly salary. This is the chief reason why I can afford to buy all that nice stuff online. There is no option to work from home. Delivery companies somehow fail to understand this, and insist on putting messages through the door with arbitrary claims such as “we will redeliver tomorrow.” No you won’t, ’cause I will be at work and you will arbitrarily return my order back to the sender! Alternatively I have to get my arse out of bed at the crack of dawn on Saturday morning and track up to a warehouse in the middle of nowhere which is opened until 10am and not a second longer with three IDs and three proofs of address to get a sodding moisturiser. I just have everything delivered to the office now.

  8. Annie

    Wow, all of these companies sound awful. Someone should create a database of retailers that use Yodel/Hermes/Etc where people can add their own horror stories and a way of using social networking to prod those retailers into better service. I have to say, here in the US, if I ever got a package that was sent via private unmarked vehicle, I would seriously hesitate to open it/make sure the retailer knew that I would never purchase from them again. For me, the average $8 shipping is preferred to some sort of sketchy, lying operation.

  9. Jane

    How’s this – I spent 5 hours in an unfurnished house with no food, zero seating and only an internet-free laptop for entertainment – then when I called the company – oh well, they’re not coming today. Nice one third party contracter. So when did they rearrange the delivery for? 7.30am. Say what?!

  10. Ellen

    I once waited ages for a parcel and ended up ringing the company to ask where it was. According to their records it had been left in the bin, ON BIN COLLECTION DAY! They didn’t even leave a card. When I complained they said they wouldn’t deliver to me anymore because I lost the last parcel, even though they admitted their delivery person had left it in the bin? I don’t order from them anymore.

  11. Claire Peucker

    Wow, this makes me thankful for the post service I have in Australia now. I’ve never had any problems like this before – because I live out of town I get a card saying that there’s a parcel at the post office and I just go and collect it. Most of the time there’s a huge queue and it’s a little out of the way, but nothing as bad as you guys have by the sounds of it!

  12. H.k. Mayhew

    My frustration is with a company that rhymes with “lootycar”. Not the actual delivery, but the state of the product delivered and then not taken back. Did I mention I now own a giant bottle of Liquid Gold and can not use it or send it back? Expensive lesson learned…..

  13. Daisy

    I agree. Yodel are shite. I work in an office, expected a delivery, the guy actually came in, looked at our office door(clearly marked) and the other companies door and walked out. What the actual frack?!

  14. Patricia Gomes

    In Portugal we have the exact same problem, but with the national postal services! Anything involving large parcels, they will leave a note saying you were not home so you have to go to the post office to collect your parcel. In truth, they don’t even carry the parcel when making the rounds and force you to lose time at the post office because they don’t do their job. I now send all my parcels to my office address, because they don’t do this little stunt on office buildings.

  15. Liz

    Wow, that sounds pretty horrible! And from the comments it sounds like you guys in the UK have to deal with this sort of thing a lot. I’m especially surprised at the bad experiences with Hermes – my Hermes delivery guy is really lovely, on time and greets me by name and asks how my day is going. It’s happened once or twice that DHL have left me attempted-delivery-cards when I was clearly at home, but scheduling a second delivery was never a problem and I’ve always gotten free stamps as an apology.

    I actually love ordering from british retailers like asos and lookfantastic for their relatively speedy (especially asos!) and free international shipping – it’s really ironic that it’s such a hassle for people int heir own country!

  16. Felicity Smith

    is the well-known etailer asos? I am having a constant battle with them as two orders I placed in January (and have been paid for) have not turned up. I keep getting ridiculous automatic emails when I write to customer services. I have loved asos since they started but this is really really putting me off ever ordering with them again!

  17. Rachel

    We’ve had horrible experiences with Royal Mail. One example of many: I received a letter saying they had attempted to deliver a package but I was not home. I looked at the stated date and know absolutely that I was home, since I work from home and keep a detailed diary. The letter said that I would have to pick up the package at the local branch. However, the deadline they gave me was BEFORE I received the letter. The package was returned to the USA. My American sister-in-law had paid US$50 to send the package and then the poor sweetie re-paid to send again. I gave her my partner’s work address, and we received the package this time, but this shouldn’t be necessary. I avoid delivering to a residential address as much as possible. My partner had to receive almost all of the stuff for our baby at his work (it was quite an onslaught), even packages of what were clearly nursing bras!

  18. madii

    Wow, reading this is just shocking! I have to say now that delivery companies in Poland are very good! I have never experienced anything like this before and I do a lot of online shopping. Can’t believe in such a country as the UK the service is so bad!

  19. Olivia Mangle

    I had a £600 camera left at a house I’d moved from previously, not only that it was left behind a bin and when I rang up they had said it had been signed for by me! Well it certainly hadn’t because I didn’t live there any more! Thankfully we rent the house to people we know but if we hadn’t who knows what would have happened!

  20. leidand

    Hahaha it could have been written by me! (If I was as witty and good with words as you). Yodel is known for not finding the buzzers or the address altogether, they’re bloody useless! Unfortunately it seems like more and more companies have started to use them for deliveries around here, which is a shame. I love RM, when I miss the delivery the post office is a 2 minute walk for me :)

  21. Verity W

    A friend had a delivery of books in cardboard wrappers put in her recycling box. Which was out because it was collection day. Can you guess what happened?

    There does seem to be an epidemic of bad couriers at the moment – another friend had a parcel delivered two streets away – to the right house number, but a completely different street name.

    Even my Royal Mail postie has taken to not bringing parcels out with him if they’re too heavy, but still posting the “sorry I missed you” card as if he’d knocked. He’s not that smart though because he’s done it after the post office has closed for early closing and said he’s dropped it there for me to pick up…

  22. maxine

    I refuse to shop with asos until they use a different courier service. Told them this too, they responded with 10% off, which doesn’t make my parcels turn up on time! The last episode involved a week and a half late delivery outside the fence of the huge company I work in (safe place) overnight when there was staff there the whole time. Disgusting!

  23. MaisyMeow

    I was sucked in by a ‘free next day delivery’ offer on Missguided facebook. I ordered a few things that HAD to be there by the weekend and placed my order on Tuesday morning knowing it was done on time to get next day delivery. I received numerous texts from the DX parcel company the next day telling me when my items were going to be delivered. But nothing. No notes through the door or anything. I then checked their website at 9pm for my delivery status and it said that they had tried to deliver the parcel, I wasn’t in and they left a card – a standard message which was completely untrue. No one had even attempted it. It also said I had to phone the next day to rearrange a delivery date. I phoned the next day, waited on hold for 10 mins then was cut off. Tried again for another 10 minutes, spoke to someone this time who cut me off again. I phoned back a third time almost in tears with frustration to be told that they couldn’t deliver it that day and it had to be the next day now, I had asked to speak to a manager but ‘there was no one available’ and I was told that my ground floor flat without a gate/garden must not have been accessible. (it was my fault?) The parcel showed up 2 days late, 3 days after my order. I then noticed a £25.00 extra charge on my phone bill for phoning the parcel company !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bearing in mind that they didn’t try to deliver my parcel which left me no choice but to phone, then they intentionally cut me off twice. When I complained to missguided they told me it was nothing to do with them and I had to phone DX company again to complain…….. I will NEVER ever deal with missguided again or that parcel company. MONEY MAKING SCAM.

  24. Gabriella

    Yodel aka CollectPlus! We use them through eBay because they are the cheapest and that’s what our customer wants. They have openly admitted to me that they stopped hiring temp staff at Christmas because they helped themselves to free “presents”! Sums them up brilliantly!

  25. Tina

    I had a package left on the driveway to my apartment complex, lucky no one ran over it! I see other packages delivered and left on top of the letter boxes, I’m so glad most places let me ship to a PO Box and then the lovely post office ladies can keep it safe til I feel like getting it!

  26. Emily

    Agreed on all counts. I had a delivery a while ago from House of Fraser and the guy who delivered it didn’t bother to ring the doorbell (my car was outside so you’d think ringing was worth a try!). He just left the box squashed under my doormat, thank god nothing got broken.

  27. Gaya

    It is more or less the same with french delivery services. I agree the lying part is the worst especially when you know you were at home and they didn’t even ring. There’s also the stealing of the parcels that’s a pain in the ass. The joys of online shopping. BUT when it does come home without problems, you’re abnormally happy as if it shouldn’t be like that every time.

  28. magdalena

    i’m relived that its not only me who have this problems! gosh it got to the point where i’m hesitating to order anything unless completely necessarily :( and the worst thing in all of it is that most companies don’t state what delivery companies they use! Honestly i think that they would have far more orders if they’d used dhl for instance. Hermes, DPD and Yodel can go F*@k themselves! :)

  29. Alli

    yodel have been horrific. One day I ordered an item from joules online. The day the item was due to be delivered it did not arrive. Joules did some chasing but did not have an answer. The skirt was finally delivered by a lovely lady in her car, stating that the person on duty yesterday had enough come about 3pm and dumped the sack of undelivered parcels out on the street. Somehow, luckily they were found and delivered the next day. Don’t get me started on all the other shocking serviced from them. In fact it has got to the stage that if a company use yodel I do not ord from them anymore.

  30. Clever

    I literally spent last night complaining to a well known clothing company with a fruit in their name about this exact company. Damaged packaging and tracking said they had tried to contact me on Friday when they hadn’t. Delivered yesterday, box was thrown at me and he walked straight away, no signature or anything. Shocking. They had the decency to offer me a 15% discount if next order, but I would rather they resolve the issues.

  31. Cara

    The absolute WORST in my area is Hermes. I live in uni halls, and they can’t seem to read the numbers on the buzzers, and just say that they were unable to deliver!

  32. Charli FLL

    I have had total hell using ‘m’odel also, slow delivery, not on time, package never turning up- they just have the worst rep and totally crap reputation, why anyone uses them is beyond me. Cheap?

  33. Emma Jane

    I’ve said it before & I’ll say it again, Yodel are the pits & Hermes certainly have their moments.I have wasted many, many, many days waiting for couriers who claim that I was out just because they couldn’t be bothered to park up & get out of their van, or want to go home early.Don’t get me started on couriers the who actually left my packages outside on the street! And guess what, they were stolen. As I said to one courier company recently – you have to meet me half way & actually ring my doorbell.

  34. Steph

    I akso check every online store to see who delivers for them before I buy anything. A quick Google usually works x

  35. Steph

    Yodel are THE worst! I have to use them to get my Nespresso capsules delivered, but they are so bad. We’ve had orders not arrive, when they leave you were out cards my bf called the number on the card and a small child picked up the phone! Couriers that don’t deliver on a Saturday really annoy me too. I work Mon-Fri, so I have all my parcels redelivered on Saturdays but if you don’t delivee then how am I supposed to get my order!? So frustrating!!

  36. sarirah

    Back when I used to subscribe to beauty boxes, they’d always get left in the recycling box outside my house. God forbid I didn’t check the box and put it out for the recycling truck. Then there was a big Lush order and they delivered it to the wrong house! It was there for a couple weeks and eventually someone who lived there came over. I thought maybe I’d written the address wrong but no it was there clear as ever. Honestly though, the thing that annoys me most is when packages turn up looking like they’ve just been through a war. I recently got one with a hole through the box and another with a giant muddy footprint on it. :/

  37. Claire

    One bad delivery is enough to stop me buying anything with that website ever again. The worst one I had was when the company said that they had delivered and had left it in a shed on our property, I replied back that the only shed we have is locked and is also behind a six foot locked fence and wasn’t visible from the road. They gave me a full refund but it really pissed me of to have to go through the most laborious refund process on earth so I never bought from them again. I don’t even know who the delivery company was because the left nothing- not even a note.

  38. Miss Amy

    I have had so many problems with delivery companies. Our house has a house name rather than a house number, which seems to cause endless confusion. I will literally get a phone call every time a parcel is being delivered to ask where the house is. It’s only a small road, and the sign on the house is pretty easy to see if you bother to look.
    Last time, a delivery driver from a delivery company which shall not be named phoned while I was at work and unable to take the call. My mum had been in the house all day, and had seen them stop outside our driveway to make the phonecall and then drive off when they couldn’t get through. USE YOUR EYES PEOPLE!
    I’ve had similar problems to you with ‘Model’. I was trialling Amazons prime delivery service and ordered my mum a kindle case for her birthday on the free next day delivery. Naturally, it didn’t arrive for 3 days, it got to the point where I was worried I wouldn’t have anything to give her on her birthday. I spent ages on the phone and emailing Amazons customer service (couldn’t get through to ‘Model’ since I didn’t have the 8 digit code… Apparently they’ll only talk to you if they’ve already bothered to show up at least once) who said they couldn’t find out where it was and so refunded the purchase and have me a £5 gift card for the trouble… The case arrived the next day. If I was Amazon I’d be really worried about something like this, what if it had been a £2,000 tv?
    Apologies for the rant, delivery companies drive me crazy :)

  39. Jen

    Yep – I’ve had that experience too. Was sat in the room at the front of my house working, a van pulled up, guy got out and just put a note through my door. I shouted to him as he was walking out of the gate, and asked him what he was playing at. He lied to my face and said he’d rung the bell and I must not have heard it! I pointed out that I’d been watching him from the window, that he hadn’t brought my package to the door with him, so he obv. never had any intention of delivering it, and that he had not rung the bell. Asked him, why, if he could get out of his van to post a piece of paper through the door, could he not just deliver the flamin’ package?! No answer. Made him go back to the van and get my delivery and then complained about the service to the retailer – got no result. Having said that a few retailers use really good delivery services that confirm by email and text – so I use them all the time and no longer use Yodel who are AWFUL! I’m not going to order from a company that provides rubbish delivery and also uses complicated loopholes to avoid paying tax – take note Amazon!

  40. Jennie

    I live in Sweden and have never had any problem with Fedex, or DHL, however UPS is another story. Ive had parcels delivered with UPS 10 times…and 9 times its been pure hell! Since they cant say if there coming by my house/area 7am or 7pm or anything in between I sit at home from 7-7, not daring to even hit the shower cause I might miss them…the day goes by, no UPS…call them at 7pm and is informed that they tried to deliver but the front gate to the buildning was locked (the front gate does NOT HAVE A LOCK, the neighbours 5 year old manages to get through it all day long playing).

    The front gate was locked is a standard reason why they did not deliver.

    I refused to accept the delivery is another.

    They were going to deliver but they forgot to put the parcel in the van….

    All in all, UPS are so useless to the point where I now never buy from companys that deliver via UPS, because I know that I have to take atleast 3 days off work to sit and wait for them….and that is a rather an expensive way to have a “free” delivery.

  41. Chloe Elizabeth

    Apparently had ’3′ delivery attempts from Yodel but when I checked with the building concierge he said no one from yodel had even turned up and then when they did leave a form behind it wasn’t filled in! Enough to make you want to pull your hair out

  42. Danni

    My sister in law is in the middle of a delivery disaster herself and surprise surprise it’s also with Yodel – she bought new bedroom furniture for her autistic son (who has had a fixation on this specific bedroom furniture for some time) and astoundingly Yodel only delivered HALF THE BED. They’ve lost the other half. How you can lose half a bed really is beyond me.

  43. Cheryl Richardson

    If they’re going to call to delivery at 11am on a Tuesday and then on a Wednesday as well you can pretty much be certain I won’t be in at 11am on Thursday either. Cue me driving to the other side of the city on a Friday evening after work to wait 30 minutes while they searched for my package. Not impressed “looks-like-model” delivery company.

    How do we know what courier services online stores use? Maybe if we knew which companies were used by who then it might help with our shopping experience?

  44. Beauty Becky

    I think it’s the same company that you mean, they have left a parcel in the recycling bin a couple of times with no note through the door so it was only by chance that we put some more rubbish in their and saw it! They also have left parcels in my back garden which means they would have had to drop them over a 6 ft fence onto concrete and again, they never left a note through the door. One of them was out there in the pouring rain for days and the box disintegrated! xx

  45. nattie

    The stuff that goes missing or rather is left at a nearby address that does not exist is another recurring problem.

    Also the delivery that is allegedly “too big for your letterbox”. Grrrr!

  46. Anita

    Ooh don’t even get me started. After 6 months of non delivery of a very expensive annual subscription because get it I wasn’t in??? Apparently I had to sign some paper, whereas funnily enough I was in most times as far as I can remember, plus there was no slip informing me that anyone had come to deliver. One day in a fit of temper I called up the subscription company and categorically told them I am going to sue. Something must have been done right coz I got my deliveries the very next day while I was out:)

  47. Michaela

    Finland’s quite good at this, you can get sms & email with notifications, if not home, they call to ask when you are available.. I’ve never had any issues, for any kind of orders, from cosmetics to furniture.

  48. Olivia

    My favourite was when ‘model’ left my parcel in a ‘safe place’ which they thought was our basement garden – a 10 foot drop onto concrete from the front door. It’s happened twice since then but definitely worth reporting to Amazon – I’m compiling my dossier now…

  49. kymie

    Well I had ‘doesnt rhyme with model – yodel’ deliver poorly on a few occasions, but the last time they decided to leave my package on my doorstep! I do not have a big front garden nor anywhere to hide anything so it was left in full view…after being delivered 3 days later than it was due (after paying for next day delivery early morning on a Friday I at least expected it on a Monday…nope it was Thursday!!) I now actively avoid any companies that use their services for delivery. Makes life more difficult for me but I’d rather not give them my money!

  50. kamidozono

    Ruth, come back to Japan :)

    Delivery heaven here! Even no need for prime memberships because stuff will appear on your doorstep the next day for free! If you aren’t in, drivers will bring it back again at your desired time.

  51. morbeam

    I can totally relate to your post. I have zillions of angry stories about the companies you mentioned. I now try to shop with companies who have a collection service. John Lewis are amazing for this, within 24hrs they will have your order waiting for you at a local Waitrose store. I find this really convenient – and it’s a FREE service! I always check if they stock the products I’m planning to buy before ordering elsewhere.

  52. Lisa

    An excellent post, well delivered. I placed an order online at Selfridges. The delivery note was scribbled on the back of a photocopied map. No identifying marks, I had no idea where it was from as I buy most things online. Absolute rubbish and it cost £4.95. I have complained but not holding my breath. Hermes are terrible, as are local couriers for h&m. They hold onto your Parcel for weeks and one even asked me to drive to her house to get it…er isn’t that your job? Raaaaaaahhhh

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