There were almost fireworks this morning when I opened the tumble dryer door to find my favourite jumper shrunk to about a third of its usual size.
“You’d still get into that!” said Mr AMR, completely missing the point, which was that he had (as usual) chucked all of the wet washing straight into the dryer without checking what might be in there. Now look, I’m not going to diss Mr AMR’s domestic skills because he would have a laughing fit – he is far better than me at keeping things tidy and staying on top of all of the household tasks – but I feel that the shrinkage of a favourite jumper deserves a public shaming.
Favourite jumper in question is the Lindsey Rib Stitch from AND/OR at John Lewis. I was given it on a shoot in September and have worn it almost every single day since. I love the colour, I love the relaxed fit, I love that it’s thick and chunky-knit without being restrictive or bulky, I love that it covers my hips and I love that the central rib detail stops my knockers from looking like gargantuan melons.
Anyway, luckily for Mr AMR, the rib stitch was still available on John Lewis* when I rushed to the website immediately after my shocking shrinkage discovery. As a bonus, it was actually on sale – £40 instead of £78. I was tempted to buy two, but talked out of it by my cousin Anna, who is not a believer in buying double. (Although surely today’s incident supports the idea of the “double buy”?)
Mr AMR has helpfully suggested that in the future I dry clean my special garments rather than using the washing machine. “If you don’t want to have your clothes ruined, then perhaps don’t put them in the wash.” I feel that suggestion is akin to me saying something like “if you don’t want to be kicked in the balls then don’t get into the bed”; I mean, using the washing machine is normal and necessary. As is getting into a bed and being free from the fear of being kicked in the bollocks. It just takes a little care when transferring wet, freshly-cleaned loads into the dryer; picking through briefly to check for woollen items and silky things, checking for lurex and sparkles and anything that looks as though it might do comical things if exposed to high heats and a tumbling motion.
Mind you, I shrank one of my sparkly star tops last week and when it came out it was even too small for Angelica! Don’t tell Mr AMR, he’s currently in a sort of “domestic debt” situation with me, where I feel I might be able to justifiably ask him to do a task that I don’t want to do. Because he owes me. So sshh.
You can find the Lindsey Rib Stitch Jumper online here* for £40. It also comes in red – I resisted because it tends to wash me out, for want of a better phrase, but it’s a jolly nice festive shade!
Photos shot on location at the wonderful No15 Great Pulteney Hotel in Bath.
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