Acting Practice

I was at a casting today for a new beauty product. There were about ten or so models, including me, waiting to ‘perform’ (haha!), and whilst we were waiting, the casting director came out to give us a few tips.

‘OK. So. You’re asleep, OK? Looking beautiful, relaxed, content. Maybe just the faintest of smiles playing over your lips. The faintest.’ He looked at us all to make sure we were paying attention. We all nodded.

‘Then you need to open your eyes, OK? Not in a crazy popping-open way, but a slow, happy waking-up way. Open them slowly, keep that smile playing on your lips, and as you open them, make sure you’re looking right at the lens. OK?’

We all nodded again.

‘So you’ve got that? Beautiful sleep, faint smile, slowly open, look to camera, don’t have crazy eyes. All good?’

We all nodded and murmured our assent, but one girl who had been listening in the corner (a gorgeous honey-skinned American girl) looked incredulously at him and said,

‘You’ve gotta be kidding, right? You want me to do all that at once? I’m a model, not a f***ing rocket scientist.’


Just for the record, it was quite difficult. Apparently I looked like Dracula waking from a hundred year sleep, leering at the camera as though it was my next victim.

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  1. Mary
    March 7, 2013 / 6:23 am

    Lol!! Omg soooo funny! It’s about 1:15 in the morning here in the U.S. and I’m having a bout of insomnia! So, being the most dedicated subscriber to everything AMR, I am rummaging through your older video archives and I must say that I adore them all! You are a brilliant writer Ruth! xo!

  2. Renee
    June 2, 2013 / 1:20 am

    Brilliant writing! I could envision the whole scene!

  3. Vani
    March 30, 2014 / 8:05 pm

    I am a bit crazed when it comes to you, Ruth (hope you don’t mind the inevitable, stalker-y, creepy, nuance of this statement), so I thought I’d go back and read and view all of you video and writing blogs from the beginning. This post was very funny and cute, so I wanted to post how I thought it was so. I wasn’t sure where it was going to head, until you got to the part about the American model’s statement about not being a rocket scientist. Even funnier was the part about your efforts being a total fail. Can’t wait to read more!

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