I Filmed My Mammogram

I went for a mammogram last month. A mammogram is a breast x-ray used to screen for breast cancer or abnormalities - they can help to detect earlier than a physical exam and so they’re a really important screening and diagnostic tool. In the UK, the NHS usually start screening at the age of 50 but many people are screened earlier than this, depending on family history and other factors.

I had my first one at 41 because I had unexplained breast pain. Nobody was particularly concerned about it, but I was referred for a mammogram anyway, which was reassuring. It’s good to know that everyone’s being thorough.

During a mammogram the breast is placed between two plates that compress the breast tissue, allowing for a clear X-ray image to be taken and I have to say that it was this compressing part of the deal that worried me, slightly. I wasn’t so worried about pain, because of all my friends and family members that had mentioned mammograms, nobody had really talked about any pain: everyone, without fail, had gone on about having their boobs squished down flat to the shape and size of a crêpe.

How was this possible? I wondered. It seemed inconceivable to me that any body part could be compressed in this way and then simply boing back to normal. Would I be walking around with flat, empty boob flaps after the mammogram was done? Would the old girls be permanently mangled?

I decided to film a mammogram in progress to see what happened to the breast tissue as it was being firmly pressed between the x-ray plates. I was especially keen to see some sort of miraculous boing-back going on when the boobs were released again. I had visions of slowing the film down so that I’d see the breast tissue regain shape, like when they start to fill a hot air balloon with hot air.

And I’d like to say that I filmed my baps with the intent of demystifying the mammogram process and maybe helping people who felt anxious or scared about having one, but I’d be lying: I simply wanted to observe my own flesh being squished and then reforming itself.

Did I then make this film into an online video with the intent of demystifying the mammogram process and maybe helping people who felt anxious or scared about having one? Yes. I’ll take whatever Brownie points are going for that one, because I rarely do anything directly useful, preferring to spend my time donning various fancy dress costumes for Instagram reels and testing out longwear foundation sticks in a sauna. (All to come.)

Since uploading and posting the mammogram video, it’s had over 230,000 views and hundreds of comments about how helpful it is to see a mammogram in progress - I’ve had hundreds more direct messages telling me how it has been the push that people have needed to make them book in for their own screening. So I’m going to plonk it here, too.

I should say that both times I’ve had a mammogram I have found it to be pretty much painless - a little uncomfortable, pressure-wise, for ten seconds or so on each side, but nothing remotely unbearable. I know that for some people it can be painful, I can only share my own experience*, but I find it far less intrusive than, say, a smear test. (Smears are also mega-important to get done, obviously. I’m not doing a “Top Trumps” of cancer screening procedures, here.)

The strangest moment for me was seeing how flaccid and empty the old girls looked when they were placed on the X-ray plate. What a shocker - they were pretty much flat and volume-less before the squashing had even begun! All this time I’d been thinking that they’d held up well to the ravages of pregnancy and breastfeeding - lol! You don’t know your own tits until they’re served up on a tray and filmed on an iPhone camera that has been masking-taped to the side of a state-of-the-art x-ray machine, I tell you.

Anyway, all jesting aside, I hope that this video is helpful. It had better be because my Mum reads these emails and now she has to see her daughter’s bits being compressed (please just skip over the video, Mum, you’ll never un-see it.)

Many thanks to Johanna Kelsey, radiographer at One Welbeck in London for allowing me to film the mammogram and for being such a huge source of information. This filming session was arranged by Natasha Green at i-Glow PR: again, so many thanks!

*I know that people’s experience can differ due to breast size, nerves, breast tenderness, menstrual cycle, age and other factors, I am only relaying my own experience. I am 44 with very dense breast tissue which means that I also had to have an ultrasound after the mammogram. Apparently it is important for both to be done, if you have dense tissue - and the younger you are, the more likely it is that you will have dense breast tissue.

Breast screening in the UK normally starts at age 50 on the NHS but if you have any concerns or abnormalities at any age then always see a doctor. Bumps, skin puckerings, changes to shape, nipple discharge - there’s a comprehensive list and a guide to how to check your breasts on the NHS website here. Mammograms don’t do away with the need to regularly check your own breasts, and vice versa.

And I don’t want to be preachy, but it is essential to know what’s normal for your own body so that you can spot when anything is up. It only takes a few minutes to check your breasts, every month, but it’s so important.

Something I’ve never told anyone before, don’t spread it around: I actively hate doing it. I’m terrified, every time, that I’m going to find something worrying and the fear makes my hands shaky. I’m sure there’s some sort of cognitive self-therapy one could do for this, but anyway. I’m just telling you in case you have the same horrible nervous feeling. Weird that I have no nerves at all about a mammogram, in a medical setting, but the thought of examining myself makes me feel ill…