My Money-No-Object Christmas List

Here’s what I’d have on my fantasy Christmas list if my husband and I ever actually exchanged gifts and didn’t spend all of our money on things like roof insulation, wood stain and floor tiles.

We are notoriously bad at buying gifts for one another, mostly because we tend to buy the things we want as and when we need them. Anything extra just feels a bit…well. Extra. Rich used to do this thing where he’d buy his way out of trouble with my gifts and get something swanky that I didn’t need and he’d always end up taking it back. So now we usually get something for the house that we will both enjoy and that feels special. A pair of rusted iron panther heads. A matching set of oil paintings from the seventies. A bronze statue of a boxing elf. You know, just normal stuff.

Anyway, unbeknownst to him, I do actually have a secret Christmas wish-list. All things that I’d have in a heartbeat but can’t justify buying for myself. I’m not sharing in an attempt to get anything from it (Rich doesn’t even read my blog posts!) but I thought it would be a bit of fun. And maybe shopping inspo, if any of you are in the fortunate position of being able to treat yourselves to things that are ultra-swish.

Here is my list.

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Rose & Violet Creams

Let’s start small. I know that this will divide opinion, but I am hugely into chocs with rose and violet cream fillings. They have a hard, dark chocolate shell and insides that taste of perfume and one of their primary selling points is that nobody else wants to actually eat them. I reiterate: buy these and you will not ever have to share.

My favourites chocolates in a tin of Quality Street/Roses are the orange and strawberry creams and these are basically just the stupidly posh version with silly floral flavours rather than normal fruity ones. I favour Charbonnel & Walker’s offering and usually buy myself a small box once a year, at Christmas. This year I have done too much buying in general and so will have to give the Rose and Violet creams a miss, but they will forever be on my wish-list.

Loop Cashmere Coatigan

The number one most useful thing in my entire wardrobe: the Loop cashmere cardigan. It makes me feel like either an off-duty prima ballerina OR the heiress of a publishing dynasty, depending on the day of the week and what I’m wearing it with. It is hugely comfortable but also elegant and makes almost any casual outfit look ten times more expensive. Possibly because the coatigan is really expensive. It’s priced more towards the coat part than the -igan and a luxurious coat at that, but by God is there a lot of wear to get out of this long, thick, soft-as-clouds cardi. Easily the most-worn thing I own. (Apart from a pair of old green shorts from Hush, but they have finally begun to disintegrate and must be retired from service.)

The coatigan comes in many colours (cue Technicolour Dreamcoat song) but I particularly love the pastel tones in the striped version. If I lost my entire wardrobe in some sort of freak Fjords Cruise boat-sinking disaster (in which crew and passengers are saved but luggage is lost)** then this would be the first thing I’d buy with my hefty compensation cheque.

Shop Loop Cashmere here*

**I am not planning a cruise around the Fjords, I just like to think of really outlandish situations that aren’t likely to ever happen because I don’t want to jinx myself.

Whilst on the subject of cashmere, I was contacted by a very, very small independent brand last week called Alabaste who make the most incredible cashmere socks. They are miles, miles thicker and more robust in feel than any other socks I’ve tried (it’s almost like the White Company ones have been folded over three times!) yet the same extreme cashmere softness. I am adding a pair in each and every colourway to my fantasy wishlist - especially the neons!

Alabaste Cashmere

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Tilly Sveaas Gold Curb Chain

I looked at one necklace by jewellery designer Tilly Sveaas a few weeks ago and have been followed around the internet by swoonworthy ads and images ever since. Not that I’m complaining. I love the chunky, heavyweight aesthetic she goes for, with thick gold chains and T-bar necklaces. The dream piece? This gold curb chain:

The current “big gold A-Team chain” obsession is Me+Em’s fault: I saw this photo of their Hallmark chain being worn with a simple black top and thought it looked so cool:

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A Beth Carter Sculpture

I could now just fill an entire page with all of the artists I love and the work I’d buy from them if, going back to the theme of this page, money was no object. But I’m going to be selective and focused and go for my favourites and so first stop on the Supermarket Sweep: Billionaire’s Edition would be Beth Carter’s studio to nab myself some bronze sculptures.

There’s something dark and magical about them, as though they’ve crept from the pages of a fairytale book. And I don’t know how Beth makes them feel so lifelike but I actually have a proper emotional response when I see them, especially in the flesh. They’re sad and fantastical and kind of unsettling and macabre but also make me feel kind of joyful and childlike. I’d have them all over the place.

bethcarter.co.uk

An S.J. Fuerst Painting

S.J. Fuerst is one of my favourite painters (and named “one of the world’s greatest living” a few years ago by one reviewer) and I could never get bored of looking at her work. Some call it hyperrealist but it’s not, strictly speaking - you can absolutely tell that they’re oil paintings when you’re up close and personal.

The subject matter is always slightly off-the-wall and humorous and completely up my street. SJ’s website is here.

Shearling Coat

I’ve been dithering for years trying to find the best “mob wife” shearling coat that is both huge and fluffy yet also wearable in a multitude of scenarios. Last year Me+Em styled their olive green fluffy coat simply with blue jeans and it looked incredible and this is the sort of versatility I’m after. Pure glamour when dressed up with tall boots and dresses, but a nonchalantly cool vibe when chucked on over jeans.

Apparently the Whistles one I fell in love with at their press preview a few months ago is due out soon and I have been refreshing their website daily so that I don’t miss it, but this is a fantasy money no object list and so I could also be seduced by a Max Mara teddy coat or this pale dove grey number from Yves Salomon. Oooph.

YSL Handbag

And now, right at the end of my painfully fantastical list that plays directly into the hands of consumerism and shows me up for the shallow bitch I really am, we have this YSL bag. This bag has also been following me around the internet, popping up in ads left right and centre and especially on the NY Times page just before I do the daily Wordle. I mean, how dare they? My most mentally vulnerable moment, when my mind channels are open and my brain is like an open maw. And they feed it with images of this bloody lovely bag so that they are virtually stamped onto my memory.

It’s this one*. Look how useful and large it is! OK, so it is actually vaguely similar to my existing bag (which is vintage and battered to absolute shit at this point) but PLAY ALONG WITH THE GAME PEOPLE, MONEY IS NO OBJECT! This is the whole point of the post!

Love that it started off with some chocolates and rapidly progressed to works of fine art and a three grand handbag…